As you know
We held your memorial last weekend
While your laughter still hung in
the air
Like chandeliers
From the heavy wooden beams
Of the empty sanctuary
You’ve left us
Where we reminded ourselves
For a time, times, and half a time
again
That you would have heard by now
“Well done, good and faithful
servant…”
Words of acceptance
Approval
Even affection
That we all so long to hear
Yes, there were many among us
Who call ourselves Christians
Because we’ve seen all that is wrong
With this world and its ways
A conveyor belt
To the gates of hell
An assembly line pressing us
Into a horror-show
Fantastical
Plastical doll-house life
Complete with miniature replicas
Of assorted drug paraphernalia
And hollow bottles of booze
And swappable body-parts
And painful sex due to the friction
Of the rigid plastic seams
Rubbing like saws through
What’s left of our fragile flesh
And yet…
There were also many among us
Who don’t call ourselves Christians
Because we’ve seen all that is wrong
With a religion practiced like a
barcode system
Given only to those who know the
correct answers
Like the star sticker on a child’s
spelling test
Who studied well
Just to avoid
Feeling unworthy
After all that was done
Behind closed doors
And remains hidden there
For the sake of the church
Yes
The church
Who will one day line up
With faces concealed
But eager to show their barcodes
To the automated scan system at
heaven’s gate
Hoping to hear that pre-recorded
digital message:
“Well done, good and faithful…”
This is who we were
Sitting there at your memorial
In that sanctuary
All of us lined up in those pews
Like AA relapsers in a dark and
crowded bar
Each and all of us drunk from the
wine
Pressed from the original fruit
Of the tree of knowledge
Of good and evil
All of us claiming
A better knowledge
Of God’s love
And yet still fearing
The wrong side of judgment
And so doing our very best
By attending church
And bible study
And prayer meetings
Or days-long benders in the
underbelly of Las Vegas
Like I said…
Drunk
Because what happens in Vegas
Stays in Vegas
Just like what happens in church
Stays in church
So we all stumble along in fear
Hoping we’ve done well enough
On our Sunday school spelling tests
Or in the drinking game called
non-judgmentalness
So that we might be counted worthy
By the God we can all agree is love
And what a glorious agreement it is
That we all are determined to love
our loved ones well
Each in our own ways
So that we too might one day hear
Those words of approval
When our last breath leaves us
Uncle Roger
You were one who loved well
When we turned and saw the
multitudes
Who had come here to honor you
Whose lives you had touched
Our hearts melted
And we knew
You weren’t received into heaven
because you had loved people so
well
No,
You were able to love them so well
because you had already been
accepted into heaven
And those words we long to hear
You must have heard
Your whole life long
Your best sermon was never preached
with words
But with your life
Loving us when we were unlovable
Showing us the open door to heaven
Where we can be received
Accepted
Approved of
And loved
As we are
Today
Not later
Not one day always yet to come
But today
Thank you for lighting the room one
more time
Goodbye Uncle Roger
And…
Well done
